Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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why did road cross the chicken Niggers love chicken.

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How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops