Kris- "Hey! Ask me if I'm a tree! Kait&Alyssa- ".....Are you a tree?...." Kris- "No.(:"

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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2 people lived next door to each other. The man said "hi" and so did the other man. What is wrong with this situation. Nothing, just friendly neighbors.

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Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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