What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? A holocaust in which all the Jews are raped by giant scorpions, and then killed.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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How does a printer work? You plug it in.

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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what did the fart say to the butt........bye

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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