Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

Error 37.

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

So a baby seal walks into a club...

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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