Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

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What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

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I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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