what did the 14 year old boy get for christmas? nothing because he his sitting in prison for killin his parents and is serving a life sentence.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Hail Hitler

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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