A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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