Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

I don't get it

A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

"Knock knock." "Come in."

whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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