Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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A jew, a homosexuel and a black guy are on a plane. It crashes and they all die in horrible circumstances.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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Guess what? You guessed it.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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America

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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