A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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