Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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