Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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