Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

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what rhymes with sloth? rape

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Q:What type of cheese isn't yours? A:NACHO CHEESE!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms.

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what's black? a lot of things.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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