what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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The mets are 3-0 this season

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What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

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Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

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A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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Dead baby jokes aren't funny, dead babies are though.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

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Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

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whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

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1+1= 69

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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