Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

knock. knock. whos there? ur mom now put ur pants back on

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

why did your mum die young because she had canser

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

What do you call it when you eat cheese that's not yours? Stealing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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