Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

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why did your mum die young because she had canser

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What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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What the problem with writing an anti-joke? Trying to not come up with a punchline.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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