Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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