Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

Conversation: Hey dawg? Whats that? Hey, remember curiosity killed the cat! You threatening me on my life and calling me a pussy? Im calling the cops. ...Because like Larsons some of my ideas suck, but since I am an asshole I also add them to fill some space.

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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