It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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People who find just saying 69 is the funniest thing ever.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

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What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

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Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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what's worse than than finding a worm up your ass? Death

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What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

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What's funny about four black guys driving off a cliff in a Cadillac? They were my friends...

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Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

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A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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