Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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whats brown and sticky a stick

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Whats the difference between KFC and Starbucks? KFC didn't murder your sister.

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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