A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

if you are reading this your wasting your time

A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

What did John name his dog? Doggy

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

No soup for you!

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

Everybody love food when they are hungry

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...