An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

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A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

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Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

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The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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