there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

"Knock knock," "Who's there?" "Black man," "Black man who?" "Gimme yo money!"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -34

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's white and black? Color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

In my opinion I am superior to you all in every single way,an opinion you might disagree with, but can respect. While on the other hand, I have no reason to respect and even less agree with your inferior opinions at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops