A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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mitt romney

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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1+1= 69

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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Knock Knock Come in!

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

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jgkbk,mn

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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