Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops