What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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