Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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