An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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4 hours later.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

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Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

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No it doesnt..

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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