how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

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your moms so fat she has kankles

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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roses are black violets are gray im color blind

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Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

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- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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Asians...

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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I like your hair

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops