What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what happened to the man who ran straight into a brick wall he bounced off it, fell back, stumbled. he lifted his head up, looked at it, put his arm to his head. got up, groaned, dusted himself down, and walked towards the pub.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

thumb_up thumb_down -92

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

So a seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops