Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

knock knock go away

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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