Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

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Women's rights

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

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My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

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What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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Is your refrigerator running? No. Oh perfect, I'm a refrigerator repairman, I'll be right over.

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To pen state administraters walk into a butt

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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