An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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