I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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Why did hitler kill all the Jews? He is racist

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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What's the difference between a giraffe and an erection? An erection is much easier to obtain.

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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Q: What do you call a black guy with his degree in dentistry? A: Doctor

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Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

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why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops