A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

hi michael

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

what is 3+3= 8

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

What's stupid a light bulb.

What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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