Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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A man walks into a bar and says ow. Two men walk into a bar, which is weird, because the second guy should have seen it coming.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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Let's write an anti-joke. K.

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Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

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balls in ya mouf

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What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

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women's rights

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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what color is blue? green

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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