What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the guy say to the mushroom?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A dwarf walks under a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops