Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

Where would canada be without nature? still here

What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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