Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

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Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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Why did the little and energetic girl fall down? Because I snapped her neck.

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what do call a large massacre of 1000000 people? a tragedy

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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Dakota Fanning

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops