how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

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Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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Your mother is average.

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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