Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators are whitWhen falling from trees, they kill you

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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What's the point of going to college? There is none.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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