What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Only in your math books can Carlos buy 14 cantaloupes without hus sanity being questioned.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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Rebecca Black

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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Bitch

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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you: your adopted me: i was so thanks for saying you ass

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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josh sucks polish adams dick

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Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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