If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

What did the banana say to the tree? Nothing, bananas can't talk

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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