roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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A shark ate your mom

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

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A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

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What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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The Blonde walked into a wall.

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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