What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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