Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

What Do call a dog with an e A doge

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

A: Knock Knock B: 7

A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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