roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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