We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

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Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

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One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

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What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Popsicles

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Where does a hobo live? A box.

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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