Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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