How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

What did hitler give his granddaughter? A gas bill.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

a drunk man got 3 beers and a 5 whiskys

Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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